Getting back in the dating world after a break-up or divorce might seem like the world’s most difficult thing to do. The longer your previous relationship was, the more complicated the return seems to be, and the longer are you prone to postponing it. Months or even years spent in the comfort of a stable relationship might put a guy under the impression that everything in the dating world has changed, no rules apply any longer, and, generally speaking, you are never getting another date again. However, we’re here to help with some dating tipsthat are meant to prove that nothing is ever as difficult as it seems. All you need to do, in order to get back in that proverbial saddle is to take it easy on yourself. Here’s how:
- Identify those coping mechanisms that are particular to your personality and situation. Yes, boys cry, too. So do full-grown men, for that matter. Maybe ending your last relationship was your fault, maybe it wasn’t. In the wake of it, it doesn’t really matter. Feel free to go on a bender or two, work out like mad, or renew your wardrobe, if that floats your boat. Grieving is fine—as long as it doesn’t come to negatively affect your life and work.
- Age ain’tnothin’ but a number.You might be a fresh-faced college graduate, a man in his prime, or a man whom society expects to be going full-throttle through his midlife crisis. Remember that your age does not define you, nor does it reveal anything else about you but the number of years you’ve been around on the planet. Cliché as it may sound, with the right mind frame, it’s never too late to start over.
- Socialize, socialize, socialize! Then socialize some more. Not only will putting yourself out there statistically improve your odds at meeting someone you hit it off with. Keeping an open mind and attitude and getting to know as many women as possible will also directly impact your appeal in a positive manner. That might seem counter-intuitive to some, especially to those men of the shy variety. However, visualize yourself at your favorite watering hole, club, or bar. You’re casually making conversation with as many women as you can. You’re not being pushy, but relaxed and sociable, cracking the occasional joke. Other women witnessing this display of social behavior will automatically perceive you as open, fun to hang out with, and all the more alluring for it.
- Understand that trends come and go, but self-confidence is always appreciated. No one is saying that renewing your subscription to Esquire, FHM, or Men’s Health is wrong. Actually, if anything, checking out current fashion trends, trendy gadgets, and the latest babes to have popped up on the scene might work wonders on your self-esteem. It might even prompt you to renew your gym subscription, while you’re at it. However, remember that fashions (in matter of clothes, accessories, and women) will come and go. The one timeless trait that you need to be working on is your self-confidence.
- Forgive yourself. There is a tremendous amount of guilt being doled out in the Western world at any given time. We are taught that there is always someone to blame. Perhaps you were mostly at fault for the break-up of your previous relationship and you now understand and regret it. Holding on to those regrets, however, will only make it more difficult for you to let go and move on. The sooner you can accept your part of the blame, acknowledge it, and own it, the sooner you’ll be back to your former self-confident self.
If you’re interested in learning practical & effective dating tips, along with many different ways to build your self-confidence, visit our friends over at the ArtofCharm.com.
Photo Credit: Life Mental Health (CC BY 2.0)
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